I
conquered to seek. I dared to speak.
I
am a person whose personality is faced with contradictories. I am a writer but
I want to be an accountant. I love numbers when I also love words. I speak and
I write. I make decisions with my mind but I foresee consequences with my
heart. I am rational but I am emotional.
But
my contradicting traits are gains. A turning point in my life showed me how to
transform these contradictions into a powerful force of action.
A way of giving
back
There
were lesser self-inclined motives. In fact, if I would put it in percentage, it
would just comprise 10 percent. Of course, I am not a hypocrite to say that I
also did it for myself. The selfish motive for AYLC was to hone my leadership
skills to be able to serve people more and build networks for the expansion of
the institution I live in and the community where I belong.
The
application was more for Divine Word College of Legazpi. I was aware that it
was already six years since we had a Divinian delegate. I wanted to give back
to my soon-to-be Alma Mater. I wanted to give back to the institution which
nested me when I had nowhere to go way back then. I wanted to give back to my
home which has molded me to the person I am today, the place which has opened
doors of opportunities and chances, and the place which has made me stronger.
And most of all, I wanted to shout to the whole world, “Hey, Divine Word
College of Legazpi exists. And it certainly has student leaders who want to
make a change.”
Servant-leader
in the making
AYLC
is a blessing that calls for responsibility. It is accountability. I am
accountable. I am accountable for all that I have, for all that I will be
receiving, for all that I would give and for all that I would share. I am
accountable to the people who have given me their trust, their love and their support.
I am accountable to the people I serve. I am accountable for all my thoughts,
words and deeds.
We
were challenged to pay forward, “To whom much is given, much is expected.” And
it’s definitely true. We student leaders have the responsibility of helping
shape the future. Indeed, we are the powerful force that can drive the
Philippines towards progress. We can always make it hand in hand.
The
first thing that hit me was the trust challenges. I really cannot say the
words, “I’m Bebs and I’m ready to fall.” It’s simply because I’m afraid to
fall. I fear to disappoint people. I don’t want them to get frustrated. I have
always lived to reach their expectations. I don’t want to see people getting
hurt. I have failed my father once and I told myself from that moment not to
fail anybody else.
Falling
for me is failing. And I have always seen myself catching people and supporting
them to stand up when they fall. I have always told myself, “I have to be
strong. I should not fail. I should always be okay to help people out.” And I
guess that’s what made me be afraid of falling.
Yet,
the trust challenges made me realize the importance of falling. It’s not all
the times that I would face success. I have learned that there are times that
we need to push and there are times that we have to pull. Other times, we are
on top and other times we are down. Sometimes, we are on the frontline,
sometimes we are the support. Time would come that we have to catch those who
fall and help them stand again but there will also be the time that we would
fall and they would be ready to catch us. But all the times, we are not alone in
reaching our goals. We would always be together because we are interconnected.
I
am not Wonderwoman to save the world. I am an ordinary person without a
supernatural power. But I am a servant-leader with an extraordinary force of
network to make a difference, to make a change.
Sangandaan
challenge
Ngunit bawat pusong
naglalakbay dumarating sa sangang daan. Ngayong narito ka, kailangang magpasya.
Aling landas ang susundin ng puso? Saan ka liligaya? Saan mabibigo? Saan ka
tutungo?
Even
before coming to AYLC and even prior to the panel interviews in November, I was
already facing the question, “Stay in the publication or run as the chairperson
for the council?” I had a 30-70 decision by then.
During
the reflection time in Caleruega, the song suddenly played. I reflected on the
three days that have passed. Yet, all that appears before me was the situation
I was in. which road will I take? Which road will I walk?
Tears
started to fall. I can’t help it. My whole life, I have been with the
publication. Yes, I had student leaderships with the Junior Philippine
Institute of Accountants and Rotaract Club of Legazpi West but it never asked
me to leave the publication. This one is different.
The
silence was deafening. It was breaking my heart. It seemed to be a torture to
hear that song which was as if challenging me to make a decision at that very
moment. I looked up, prayed harder and asked God for His plans. I closed my
eyes and looked deep into my heart. I wanted to move with the people. And I
told myself, “Whichever road I take, I can serve my fellow students. It is
God’s plan that I will follow.”
I
felt calm. I’ve made my decision to 0-100. Yes, I would run for the student
council as its Chairperson. The sangandaan
really is not making a choice between the publication and student council. They
are different worlds but their common denominator is student service. The
upcoming CSEB Election is my sangandaan.
Whatever the result will be, I would respect it and accept it. It’s God’s plan.
What is important is that I have fought fairly for the position. I have the
clean intentions. My sangandaan lies
on my fellow Divinians.
AYLC
made me realize the different forms of leadership and service. It all boils
down to self-awareness. When you are aware of who you are and what you can do,
you know your place. And with it, you can serve because you can give yourself
to service and to the people you serve. If you’re not able to give yourself to
what you do, you are not a good leader: you can never become a servant-leader.
Multi-faceted
voice
What
kind of servant-leader am I? How would I be able to throw a starfish back to
the sea? The answer leads me back to a question in the panel interview.
I
was asked, “You are a writer. You want to be an accountant. But you are also in
Rotaract. Which is closest to your heart?” I certainly was expecting to be
asked why I was in writing when I wanted to be an accountant. I was always
asked about it. But that moment came straight to my face. It took me a minute
before I smiled and answered comfortably, “We can always have the best of both
worlds. They are all close to my heart because they share a common denominator.
They all make me the voice.”
The
Lord Jesus Christ is the perfect example of a servant-leader. He is also filed
with contradicting personalities. But He is the Greatest Leader. And to Him, I
kneel and pray that we will all continuously be shaped as tomorrow’s leaders.
After
six years, I was able to share again a Divinian’s voice. And I would always be
the voice who would speak of the truth, hear the hope of the people and shout
their cries for change. I am the voice who would teach them also how to speak
for themselves.
And
if there is one thing I realized with AYLC, that is the common denominator of
my incongruities. And it leads me to saying – My passion is writing. My
profession is accounting. My mission is serving.
_____________________________
Baby Lyn Morota is a 3rd year BS Accountancy student of Divine Word College of Legazpi
